Guest Adventurer: Finding My Passion as an Empty Nester

Finding my passion is proving to be more challenging than I thought. Having been a mother from my mid-teenage years, I never had the opportunity or freedom to discover my true passions and what I was good at. All the jobs I’ve had were for the purpose of keeping a roof over my children’s head and to keep the wolves from our door so to speak.

Even though I’ve had a nine year career as a Midwife, my journey into Midwifery was also due to being in survival mode. I didn’t choose it as such, it was more the best option to do at the time. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had some great times sharing the most precious time in the lives of women, couples and babies who I’ve supported and continue to support over the years. I’ve been passionate about my work and the women I’ve cared for, but there’s always been something missing.

There were very few times I remember waking up and thinking how excited I was to get up and go to work. More often than not, I’d get up and think, ‘Dear God, please don’t let me mess up today’. Midwifery has some beautiful moments, but it’s also lots of hard work and responsibility. Like all healthcare professions, there’s a lot of litigation avoidance. This takes the satisfaction out of the job somewhat.

Not Knowing What I Want

Now that I’m an empty nester and have the freedom to find my true passion in life, I’m surprised to discover that I’m coming up with a blank wall! Ouch. Have I lived my life for my children so much that I forgot about me?

I guess in the grand scheme of things, one month as an empty nester is not long and I shouldn’t really put too much pressure on myself. But I never realised how hard finding my passion could be.

Things I’ve Enjoyed Learning About

I guess the best place to start will be to think about things I’ve enjoyed learning about when I did have some free time. These include:

Learning about Complimentary Therapies, Food and Nutrition and Photography. So far these three topics are the only things which really ignite my fire.

Why Do We Feel the Need to Be Needed?

A few years back I qualified in Indian Head Massage, Reflexology and Craniosacral Therapy. I think I’m pretty good too, as my clients have expressed enjoyment and relaxation following the treatments they received. However as the years have gone by, I found that my hands and fingers have not been able to stand the test of time, or rather the pressure required to provide effective Reflexology treatments.

I don’t think I can earn a living providing Indian Head Massage. Enough said.

Craniosacral Therapy is one thing I do enjoy, but opening a clinic also means doing some extra training to get the insurance that is required to practice. Something that I don’t have the time or money for at the moment. I will also need to arrange a venue to run a clinic.

If I was being really honest, I think I chose these therapies for two reasons;

1) Was in attempt to increase my chances of earning an extra buck and;
2) I think my self-confidence wasn’t as developed as it is now. I felt good making others feel good. It made me feel needed.

But now I’m more secure within myself. I want to be with others’ because I want to be, not because I want to feel needed. Having been a voice for the women I care for, I’ve gained the confidence in my self and my abilities. I no longer have the need to feel needed.

What I want now is to develop something which I’m passionate about. It’s not just about the money or the adulation. I want to get up in the morning and think, ‘Yes! Let’s get this show on the road!’

Nutritional Therapy and Photography

This is my current passion. You already know how Mr G and I love our food. On the whole we eat pretty healthily, we just need to eat less. Shock face.

I began a Nutritional Therapy Diploma in 2014, triggered by what seems to be women’s lack of knowledge of what to eat during pregnancy. Unfortunately due to life changes which occurred last summer, I was unable to continue into year two last year.

My aim is to continue with Year Two of the course this September (2016) and develop my knowledge into a business once I’ve qualified. I know that I have a tough and expensive two years ahead of me, as the course is not cheap. I have another blog about my experience as a Nutritional Therapy student, but it has been somewhat neglected.

The nutritional course has ignited my other passion, which is photography. My nutrition blog includes recipes which I’ve created and taken photos of to illustrate the dishes I’ve created. I’ve since learnt how to take better photos, but I know I’m nowhere near as good as PinchofYum.com. But I’m working on it! I have taken some photos of dishes I’ve created for Mr G and I, but I’m yet to decide which blog to post them on.

Finding My Passion out of the Comfort Zone

It’s early days, but one thing I do want to do is to discover what I am capable of. The above ideas for finding my passion have either passed or is still on the boil. I guess this will be a continuous work in project for the time being.

What gets you up in the morning?

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